What is it?

We were playing a new game today called "Picture Rhymes." This game has a variety of levels, the easiest is for the teacher to pick up a picture card and give the students clues about what the picture is of. There is a game board with all the pictures on it so they can use visuals to help make a conclusion based on the clues. I picked up a card and gave the clues: this is a part of your body, you use it to smell or sniff, and it is on your face. The students raised their hands excitedly and I called on Aaron. He said, "A shoe, a shoe!" (Ok, so shoes - stinky feet - smelling) I asked him if there was a shoe on his face, and he disappointedly said, "No." So I repeated the clues again, and Daisy told me it was a cat (She has cats, and maybe hers does lay on her face at night). Finally I told them to touch their eyes, noses, and mouths as I reviewed the clues one last time. "Nose!" they all shouted and high fived each other.

Later Beth was looking at a book of pictures. She pointed to a picture of a present and said, "Happy Birthday!" I was very excited because she made a personal connection, and she verbalized it too.

Also, last week we had spring picture day. When it was Stephen's turn to go, he turned to me and asked, "Mrs. Jones, will you pop my collar so I can get all the ladies?" Classic.

Insomnia

It's 4:22 a.m. on a Monday morning and I can't sleep. This is what this ongoing stressful parent problem at school has done to me.
We had a safety meeting (me, Principal, police officer, case manager, both parents) on Tuesday morning. Jessica's mother came in already pissed off and yelling. There's no working with this irrational lady. At least her husband is more sane, and he will actually listen to us and talk to us about the situation. The officer told Jessica's mom that if she threatens violence again to Rob's mom or about her in front of a school staff member, then Rob's mom can file assault charges and also file a restraining order. This would be good for my class because she probably wouldn't be allowed near Rob eaither - so that means she can't come into the school. She dot so mad when she found that out that she yelled, "I'm done with this fing meeting!" and left in the middle! Good - let every one see that she is out of control.

Hello Crazy Pills!

I have a feeling I'm going to get a "surprise visit" this week. Probably why I can't sleep. Damn this woman.

Crazy Pills

I think I'm going insane, but I'm not the one on crazy pills. I think Jessica's mom and granny are. Thursday The principal, case manager, myself, spec ed. district coordinator, Jessica's mom, Jessica's maternal grandmother had a meeting. Oh, and Jessica's mom called the head of the parent council as an advocate to be there. Jessica's grandmother did most of the talking and here are just a few of her lovely words:
1. Jessica is being "abused" at school
2. The school didn't do anything after the kissing incident (really, then what was the whole talk about no hugging/touching and role playing good touch/bad touch w/ the social worker about?)
3. Jessica should get her special education rights, but Rob's rights don't matter.
4. If Jessica gets hurt AT ALL from now on she's going to the local news channels and suing the district (um, good luck with that one).
5. She's going to ask all the parents in my class to sign a petition to get Rob kicked out of the class. HA, the spec ed. coord. turned to her and said, "That's illegal". Then when the case manager told her she was on the verge of harassing an 8 year old boy (Rob) she stood over the case manager and yelled, "I haven't harassed anyone!" Way to prove your point lady!
6. She said she's going to the central office to look at his file and read though all the things he's done. We told her that was also illegal. Hello, privacy!?
7. She asks Jessica almost every day ("Oh, and believe me, I ask!") if she likes her teacher (me). Jessica does like her teacher. Then in the next sentence she tells us that you can't trust teachers and she sent her own son to school with a tape recorder in his pocket to catch a teacher using inappropriate language.

C - R - A - Z - Y ! I couldn't make this shit us if I tried.

The mom and granny just wanted to go on and on about shit that happened over 1 1/2 years ago! The principal asked them what they wanted us to do and they had no answer. They don't want to solve the problem because we've done everything we can for them and they are still not appeased! They're looking for something. And they think they are a lot smarter than they are. I pointed out that Jessica needs to follow the teacher's directions if we tell her to stay away from someone/something she needs to do that.

So the spec ed. coor. is going to send a spec ed. coach to my room 3 times unannounced in the next month. Then granny says, "Yeah, because I don't want the teacher tells the kids to be all good and then it's a horse and pony show!" For goodness sake lady. I said that was fine, and she is welcome whenever she needs to come. I'm doing my job (or trying to in the midst of all this).

After the mom and granny left the principal told the spec. ed. coor. "Mrs. Jones is an excellent teacher, and I'm afraid this whole thing is going to drive here away from teaching." She also said she wouldn't put up with all of it and she would have quit by now. The next morning I saw her and she said, "Can you believe that shit? Those are some crazy bitches!" HA! I've never heard her talk like that before. At least I know we're together on this. I know she has my back now.

The next day after the meeting happened:
I was helping students clean out their desks when I saw Jessica walk over to throw trash in the trash can while Rob was spinning around with his backpack on 5 feet from the trash can. Then Jessica told me, “Rob hit me with his backpack.” I asked her if he “hit” her or “touched” her. She said hit. I demonstrated a “touch” and a “hit” on my own hand. Then I had her demonstrate on my hand a “hit” and a “touch.” I said, “He touched you, Jessica.” I replayed what happened with my aide (being Rob) and me (being Jessica) (They bumped into each other when he was spinning around) and I asked her, “Is that what happened?” She said, “Yes.” Then I asked her what she was going to tell her mom, and she said, “That Rob hit me with his backpack.” I told her that she walked over near him, which was not allowed. I then took her to the office to tell the principal and make her aware the most recent events. She was mad at Jessica. At dismissal I walked her outside and told her mother what happened. The mother immediately asked Jessica, “Is that what happened?” Then I told the mother that Jessica needs to learn the difference between “hit” and “touch” because she is referring to a “touch” as a “hit.”

OH. MY. LORD. Is it ever going to end?

I heart Obama

This afternoon right before dismissal Jessica tripped on her own foot and bumped her knee. She came and showed me that her knee was red and it hurt. Any other kid I'd just say, "Are you ok? Tell me if it still hurts in 10 minutes." (usually they forget it even happened) With Jessica, however, it was like the fire alarm went off. I took her into the office, got her an ice pack and went outside to tell her mother (who waits outside of the school for 45 minutes before dismissal and gossips with parents). When I told her what happend she said, "How did she trip?" and I said, "On her own foot." Then she immediatly walks over to jessica and asks her how she tripped. Jesica said that she didn't know. Ha! Can't blame any one but your clumsy kid for this one lady!

Speaking of which, the meeting with Jessica's mom, the head of Special Education, the principal, etc. is tomorrow. I must admit I'm anxious about it, but what's really going to come of it? Probably nothing. I and the school have done everything we can to please this crazy lady - and I have it all documented to prove it.

Yesterday I was at a conference and the principal was there. After she left half day (of course) one of my colleagues told me that she thinks the principal is a good judge of character, even if she doesn't know you well. I responded that I am completely insulted by that. When the principal first met me (over 3 years ago) she accused me of being an "elitist" because of how I said, "I though I was testing my own students" when they told us who we were testing for the statewide assessment. So this other teacher then told me, "When we came to this conference in October and you walked in with your Obama coffee cup from 7-11, the principal turned to me and said, 'Well, I didn't know she was a Democrat.'"

No, I'm a rich bitch Republican because I'm white and from the south!

Treading Water

Jessica is out sick with the flu FOR THE WHOLE WEEK! Don't get me wrong - I do not want a child to be sick and have to miss an entire week of school. At the same time though, I am selfishly doing backflips because I feel like I can actually breath. I don't have to watch her all day while trying to teach. A few events of note over the past week:

1. My students know I am already married, but they don't quite understand what that means. Usually Stephen asks me when I'm going to get a new boyfriend. Tuesday he asked me to marry him. I said I already had a husband. Then Aaron said, "When I grow up, I'm going to have a husband." Of course he doesn't really know what that means, but he already kissed a boy so you never know.

2. We play a game called "Silent Ball" in my room as a short break from work. The kids stand in a circle and throw a squishy ball to each other. They get out by: talking or making any noises, dropping the ball, making a bad throw. The only thing you CAN say is the name of the person you are throwing the ball to. We also have a rule that if you do get out, then you have to be a good sport or we won't play again.

Usually during this game Beth (autistic) will be off in a corner doing her own thing. Today she stood in the circle and played the game! She caght the ball when the kids threw it to her. I would point and say a name for her to throw it to, and she did! Very exciting.

3. Stephen threw up right after lunch in the doorway of my classroom. Thankfully, there was no domino effect. Nasty.

Drama

A little update on the recent Jessica situation: The case manager told me that she got a phone call on Friday from the Head of the Special Education Department for the district. The Head of the department told my case manager that Jessica's mom said to her, "My child's life is being threatened on a daily basis." WHAT!?
Yes, because every day I hand Rob a gun and tell him to go crazy.

OK, she's really lost it. This is completely false! The case manager told her that we switched Jessica's preps and lunch, and she is basically my shadow all day. She also told her about this mother. She's a hypochondriac for her child. The head of the department still wants to have a meeting at our school with the principal, Jessica's mom, case manager, social worker, and me. I will gladly march in there and show all my notes and documentation about every time Jessica does not follow the directions or initiates any conversation, touching, or closeness to Rob. Bring it!